2012:the-cynic-lucian
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====== The Cynic by Pseudo-Lucian ====== | ====== The Cynic by Pseudo-Lucian ====== | ||
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+ | ==== Authored by Frank Redmond, 2012; Original from Fowler. ==== | ||
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===== Modernized Version ===== | ===== Modernized Version ===== | ||
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- | Lycinus. A Cynic | + | //Lycinus. A Cynic// |
- | Ly. Give an account of yourself, you cynic. You wear a beard and let your hair grow long. You deliberately avoid wearing shirts. You showcase your skin. Your feet are bare. You choose a wandering, outcast, beastly life. Unlike other people, you make your own body the object of your strict adherance to principle. You go from place to place sleeping on the hard ground where chance finds you, with the result that your old cloak, neither light nor soft nor bright to begin with, has a crusty layer of filth carried on it. What of it all? | + | //Ly.// Give an account of yourself, you cynic. You wear a beard and let your hair grow long. You deliberately avoid wearing shirts. You showcase your skin. Your feet are bare. You choose a wandering, outcast, beastly life. Unlike other people, you make your own body the object of your strict adherance to principle. You go from place to place sleeping on the hard ground where chance finds you, with the result that your old cloak, neither light nor soft nor bright to begin with, has a crusty layer of filth carried on it. What of it all? |
- | Cy. It meets my needs. It was easy to come by, and it gives its owner no trouble. It is the right cloak for me. Please tell me, do you not call extravagance a vice? | + | //Cy.// It meets my needs. It was easy to come by, and it gives its owner no trouble. It is the right cloak for me. Please tell me, do you not call extravagance a vice? |
- | Ly. Oh, yes. | + | //Ly.// Oh, yes. |
- | Cy. And economy an excellence? | + | //Cy.// And economy an excellence? |
- | Ly. Yes, again. | + | //Ly.// Yes, again. |
- | Cy. Then, if you find me living economically, | + | //Cy.// Then, if you find me living economically, |
- | Ly. I do not call your life more economical than other people' | + | //Ly.// I do not call your life more economical than other people' |
- | Cy. That brings us to the questions, "What is want?", | + | //Cy.// That brings us to the questions, "What is want?", |
- | Ly. If you want, yes. | + | //Ly.// If you want, yes. |
- | Cy. A man is self-sufficient when he meets his necessities. Will that do? | + | //Cy.// A man is self-sufficient when he meets his necessities. Will that do? |
- | Ly. I pass that. | + | //Ly.// I pass that. |
- | Cy. And desire occurs when the provision falls short of necessity, does not satisfy the need? | + | //Cy.// And desire occurs when the provision falls short of necessity, does not satisfy the need? |
- | Ly. Yes. | + | //Ly.// Yes. |
- | Cy. Very well, then, I do not desire. Nothing of mine fails to satisfy my need. | + | //Cy.// Very well, then, I do not desire. Nothing of mine fails to satisfy my need. |
- | Ly. How are you able to do that? | + | //Ly.// How are you able to do that? |
- | Cy. Well, consider the purpose of anything we need. The purpose of a house is protection? | + | //Cy.// Well, consider the purpose of anything we need. The purpose of a house is protection? |
- | Ly. Yes. | + | //Ly.// Yes. |
- | Cy. Clothing - what is that for? protection too, I think. | + | //Cy.// Clothing - what is that for? protection too, I think. |
- | Ly. Yes. | + | //Ly.// Yes. |
- | Cy. But now, please tell me, what is the purpose of the protection, in turn? the better condition of the protected, I presume. | + | //Cy.// But now, please tell me, what is the purpose of the protection, in turn? the better condition of the protected, I presume. |
- | Ly. I agree. | + | //Ly.// I agree. |
- | Cy. Then do you think my feet are in worse condition than yours? | + | //Cy.// Then do you think my feet are in worse condition than yours? |
- | Ly. I cannot say. | + | //Ly.// I cannot say. |
- | Cy. Oh, yes. Look at it this way. What's the purpose of feet? | + | //Cy.// Oh, yes. Look at it this way. What's the purpose of feet? |
- | Ly. To walk. | + | //Ly.// To walk. |
- | Cy. And do you think my feet walk worse than yours, or that of the average man's? | + | //Cy.// And do you think my feet walk worse than yours, or that of the average man's? |
- | Ly. Oh, not that, I dare say. | + | //Ly.// Oh, not that, I dare say. |
- | Cy. Then they are not in worse condition, if they walk just as well. | + | //Cy.// Then they are not in worse condition, if they walk just as well. |
- | Ly. That may be so. | + | //Ly.// That may be so. |
- | Cy. So it appears that, as far as feet go, I am in no worse condition than other people. | + | //Cy.// So it appears that, as far as feet go, I am in no worse condition than other people. |
- | Ly. No, I do not think you are. | + | //Ly.// No, I do not think you are. |
- | Cy. Well, the rest of my body, then? If it is in worse condition, it must be weaker, strength being the excellence of the body. Is mine weaker? | + | //Cy.// Well, the rest of my body, then? If it is in worse condition, it must be weaker, strength being the excellence of the body. Is mine weaker? |
- | Ly. Not that I can tell. | + | //Ly.// Not that I can tell. |
- | Cy. Consequently, | + | //Cy.// Consequently, |
- | Ly. None whatever. | + | //Ly.// None whatever. |
- | Cy. It would not be healthy, if it were malnourished. For bad food injures the body. | + | //Cy.// It would not be healthy, if it were malnourished. For bad food injures the body. |
- | Ly. That is true. | + | //Ly.// That is true. |
- | Cy. If so, it is for you to explain why you blame me and depreciate my lifestyle and call it miserable. | + | //Cy.// If so, it is for you to explain why you blame me and depreciate my lifestyle and call it miserable. |
- | Ly. Easily explained. Nature (which you honour) and the Gods have given us the earth, and brought all sorts of good things out of it, providing us with abundance not merely for our necessities, | + | //Ly.// Easily explained. Nature (which you honour) and the Gods have given us the earth, and brought all sorts of good things out of it, providing us with abundance not merely for our necessities, |
- | Cy. You may be right. But take this case. A rich man, indulging comfortable instincts, entertains at a banquet all sorts and conditions of men. Some of them are sick, others sound, and the dishes provided have as much variety as the guests. There is one of these to whom nothing happens out of course. He has his finger in every dish, not only the ones within easy reach, but those some way off that were intended for the sick and disabled. This even though he is in discourteous health, has not more than one stomach, requires little to nourish him, and is likely to be upset by an excess. What is your opinion of this man? Is he a man of sense? | + | //Cy.// You may be right. But take this case. A rich man, indulging comfortable instincts, entertains at a banquet all sorts and conditions of men. Some of them are sick, others sound, and the dishes provided have as much variety as the guests. There is one of these to whom nothing happens out of course. He has his finger in every dish, not only the ones within easy reach, but those some way off that were intended for the sick and disabled. This even though he is in discourteous health, has not more than one stomach, requires little to nourish him, and is likely to be upset by an excess. What is your opinion of this man? Is he a man of sense? |
- | Ly. Why, no. | + | //Ly.// Why, no. |
- | Cy. Is he temperate? | + | //Cy.// Is he temperate? |
- | Ly. No. | + | //Ly.// No. |
- | Cy. Well, then there is another guest at the same table. He seems unconscious of all that variety, fixes on some dish close by that suits his need, eats moderately of it and confines himself to it without a glance at the rest. You will surely find him a more temperate and better man than the other? | + | //Cy.// Well, then there is another guest at the same table. He seems unconscious of all that variety, fixes on some dish close by that suits his need, eats moderately of it and confines himself to it without a glance at the rest. You will surely find him a more temperate and better man than the other? |
- | Ly. Certainly. | + | //Ly.// Certainly. |
- | Cy. Do you see, or must I explain? | + | //Cy.// Do you see, or must I explain? |
- | Ly. What? | + | //Ly.// What? |
- | Cy. That the hospitable entertainer is God, who provides this variety of all kinds that each may have something to suit him. This is for the sound, that for the sick. This for the strong and that for the weak. Everything is not available for all of us. Each person is to take what is within reach, and of that only what he most needs. | + | //Cy.// That the hospitable entertainer is God, who provides this variety of all kinds that each may have something to suit him. This is for the sound, that for the sick. This for the strong and that for the weak. Everything is not available for all of us. Each person is to take what is within reach, and of that only what he most needs. |
Now you others are like the greedy unrestrained person who lays hands on everything. Local productions will not do for you, the world must be your repository. Your native land and its seas are quite insufficient. You purchase your pleasures from the ends of the earth, prefer the exotic to the local, the costly to the inexpensive, | Now you others are like the greedy unrestrained person who lays hands on everything. Local productions will not do for you, the world must be your repository. Your native land and its seas are quite insufficient. You purchase your pleasures from the ends of the earth, prefer the exotic to the local, the costly to the inexpensive, | ||
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It is superfluous to mention the abuse of the sexual instinct, so easily managed if indulgence were not made an object. And if madness and corruption were limited to that! But men nowadays pervert the use of everything they have, turning it to unnatural purposes, like him who insists on making a carriage of a couch. | It is superfluous to mention the abuse of the sexual instinct, so easily managed if indulgence were not made an object. And if madness and corruption were limited to that! But men nowadays pervert the use of everything they have, turning it to unnatural purposes, like him who insists on making a carriage of a couch. | ||
- | Ly. Is there such a person? | + | //Ly.// Is there such a person? |
- | Cy. Why, he is you! You for whom men are beasts of burden, you who make them shoulder your couch-carriages, | + | //Cy.// Why, he is you! You for whom men are beasts of burden, you who make them shoulder your couch-carriages, |
Again, when people use edible things not for food but to get dye out of - the murex-dyers, | Again, when people use edible things not for food but to get dye out of - the murex-dyers, | ||
- | Ly. Certainly not. The flesh of the murex can provide a pigment as well as food. | + | //Ly.// Certainly not. The flesh of the murex can provide a pigment as well as food. |
- | Cy. Ah, but it was not made for that. So you can force a mixing-bowl to do the work of a saucepan. But that is not what it was made for. However, it is impossible to exhaust these people' | + | //Cy.// Ah, but it was not made for that. So you can force a mixing-bowl to do the work of a saucepan. But that is not what it was made for. However, it is impossible to exhaust these people' |
Moreover, if you think that because I need and use but few things I live the life of a beast, that argument lands you in the conclusion that the Gods are yet lower than the beasts. For they have no needs at all. But to clear your ideas on the comparative merits of great and small needs, you have only to reflect that children have more needs than adults, women than men, the sick than the well, and generally the inferior than the superior. Accordingly, | Moreover, if you think that because I need and use but few things I live the life of a beast, that argument lands you in the conclusion that the Gods are yet lower than the beasts. For they have no needs at all. But to clear your ideas on the comparative merits of great and small needs, you have only to reflect that children have more needs than adults, women than men, the sick than the well, and generally the inferior than the superior. Accordingly, | ||
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These external looks that you pour contempt upon, you may learn that they are seemly enough not merely for good men, but for Gods, if you will look at the Gods' statues. Do those resemble you, or me? Do not confine your attention to Greece. Take a tour round the foreign temples too, and see whether the Gods treat their hair and beards like me, or let the painters and sculptors shave them. Most of them, you will find, have no more shirt than I have, either. I hope you will not venture to describe again as mean an appearance that is accepted as godlike. | These external looks that you pour contempt upon, you may learn that they are seemly enough not merely for good men, but for Gods, if you will look at the Gods' statues. Do those resemble you, or me? Do not confine your attention to Greece. Take a tour round the foreign temples too, and see whether the Gods treat their hair and beards like me, or let the painters and sculptors shave them. Most of them, you will find, have no more shirt than I have, either. I hope you will not venture to describe again as mean an appearance that is accepted as godlike. | ||
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